Thursday, 09 July 2009

  • [differences]

    people are different.

    that's a fact.

    starting with physical differences of race, color of skin, fingerprints, and genetic information and ending (well, continuing) with mental features as character traits, mentalities, thought processes, etc.

    if we were all the same, it would be boring. God's creativity is immense and immeasurable.

    but at the same time, there are moments when i desperately wish that there were more of similarities between people. that would lead to a better understanding. 

    at my work (and i guess all you who work will understand me), it seems like we got all the personalities represented. some are more popular, some are rare. i thank God for a friend Anyuta i got at work because she understands me like no one else (well, at least at work. i still have Anne, my best friend, outside of work)...

    today for some reason i was especially perceptive to the differences and they drove me up the wall.

    i guess, all i am trying to say that i just want people to accept me for WHO I AM. i try to do that as well (obviously failing because i can't accept people who try to change me)... all i want is understanding. i don't need advices or something. i'll ask if i need anything (and i do ask often).

    please... i am not you. you are not supposed to be me. so stop trying to make me like you. stop molding me into a shape that is foreign for my INFJ personality.

    INFJs are deeply concerned about their relations with individuals as well as the state of humanity at large. They are, in fact, sometimes mistaken for extroverts because they appear so outgoing and are so genuinely interested in people -- a product of the Feeling function they most readily show to the world. On the contrary, INFJs are true introverts, who can only be emotionally intimate and fulfilled with a chosen few from among their long-term friends, family, or obvious "soul mates." (typelogic)

    please... all i ask... let me be who i am.

Tuesday, 07 July 2009

  • Currently
    Prodigal Son (Dean Koontz's Frankenstein, Book 1)
    By Dean Koontz, Kevin J. Anderson
    see related

    [Chamber American Independence Day Picnic]

    last week was hectic at work. even though i live and work in Ukraine, my place of work is American Chamber of Commerce and hence we celebrate American Independence Day.

    the Picnic is actually our biggest event since every year we get a few thousand people gathered together at a stadium in Kyiv, having fun, eating BBQ stuff, enjoying a Grand Raffle, and finally the main hit of the Picnic is, of course, the fireworks.

    since we had our fireworks to Black Eyed Peas' Boom Boom Pow music, for the full experience, click on the youtube video to accompany the reading.

    so... the day before... actually, two days before were crazy. work from 9AM to 12AM is... well... tiring.

    Picnic Madness 12.jpg

    but, with our staff (and stuff) you never get bored at the office.

    Picnic Madness 11.jpg

    i won the shorts. there were like 15 people who wanted them and only 6 pairs of shorts. i was one of the lucky winners. i don't even know how many people have asked me at the Picnic where have i gotten such great shorts. my answer was simple - Old Navy

    Picnic Madness 10.jpg

    don't you love our clean desk policy? this is standard view of one of the rooms in our office when we're preparing for something big

    Picnic Madness 9.jpg

    Vlad trying to put coins in his eye sockets...

    Picnic Madness 7.jpg 

    and succeeding

    Picnic Madness 8.jpg 

    i had a camera in my hands... always a good thing!

    Picnic Madness 6.jpg

    these are the Picnic coins. you could only buy stuff at the Picnic using these.

    Picnic Madness 5.jpg

    our lovely administrative manager.

    Picnic Madness 13.jpg

    the Picnic has started. can you tell i was in the Kids' Zone?

    Picnic Madness 4.jpg

    and of course, when i saw Ronald McDonald, i could not resist to take a picture with him. he was great. the only thing that was weird... i got used to the statue one, and it felt awkward to actually TALK to the guy and hear him talk back. he was goofy.

    Picnic Madness 3.jpg

    my two ex-university mates. the blond gal used to work at the Chamber (left this Monday) and the redhead gal works at an English-language newspaper called Kyiv Post.

    Picnic Madness 2.jpg

    just me and my friend from Policy team, who was helping me with the kiddos and volunteers.

    Picnic Madness 1.jpg

    our awesome boss Jorge and his wife Courtney.  

    Jorge and Courtney Zukoski

    Independent Lady

    Courtney Independence

    and finally, the fireworks!

    Fireworks Fireworks 
    Fireworks

    i love my work. can you tell?

  • [sigh]

    i was looking through old posts of mine, going a year at a time (to see what i was doing in July 2008 and 2007) and realized that two years ago i was in the States, enjoying the wonderful nature of Idaho Falls as well as goofy Gamache clan i had a chance to visit. 

    i miss those times. i miss dad. i miss our daily tradition of sitting on the porch swing at 11PM, watching the sattelite sail past us way up high in the sky, trying to get Nome's cold nose off my side because it tickled... quiet times, times of laughter, times of crying (there were those as well)... the pony-tail attacks... 

    i miss morning prayers at o'dark thirty when dad was getting ready to leave for work. 

    i miss Nomes, Tai-Bear, and DawgSnax. 

    it seems like those times were so long ago, yet so recent. but as i think about it, it also seems like i've started working at the Chamber only yesterday, yet it has been over a year now. 

    time flies. and bugs.

Monday, 06 July 2009

  • [??]

    how can a person be all nice and good and quiet and overly perfect at work, and yet the pictures from a social network tell a different story? 

    not that the pics are bad... they just don't connect with the person i know in real life...

Saturday, 04 July 2009

  • [do you have recurring nightmares? what happens in them?]

    i guess i can't technically call it a nightmare, since it ceased to scare me, but comparing to all other dreams that i have these are the least pleasant.

    dreams about elevators.

    when i was a kid (about 7, i think), i got stuck in an elevator. and remember, i live in Ukraine. our elevators are similar to those at the Matrix Oracle's place... so standing for an hour in the dark elevator all by myself was traumatic. i did not ride elevators for 3 years after that. i do now...

    so in my dreams the elevators either crash down, erupt in fires, go through the rooftop, or move weirdly. sometimes they don't have floor. sometimes they don't have ceiling. sometimes both.

    since i used stairs instead of an elevator (i live on 8th floor), very often in my dreams besides crazy elevators, i dream of going up the stairs, and i can't get to my floor finally... then when i stop, i realize that i am actually on 9th floor, and there are either no stairs back at all, or they are on fire, or only certain steps still remain... weird  

    like i said, i am not scared anymore, but it's interesting to analize the progression of those dreams and see what new details can be added to the general story by my tired brain.

    I just answered this Featured Question; you can answer it too!

    and talking about a tired brain... i am off to bed.

Wednesday, 01 July 2009

  • Currently
    Stay
    By Jeremy Camp
    see related

    [something new and L-words.]

    as i was walking to the bus stop after a quite long day at work (7AM till 8PM - 13 hours...), i raised my head to watch the birds that painted invisible intricate ornaments on the blue sky.

    the Sun was setting already and the buildings were basking in the golden light. but that wasn't what drew my attention.

    as i watched the birds and actually told God that i envy their ability to fly high above everything, i saw a reflection of the dying sunshine on one of the birds' wings! i blinked, not sure that i have seen what i have seen. continuing my leisury walk to the bus stop, i looked at other birds as they flew... and realized that that one-moment reflection was not a trick on my eyes. it was real - the birds were dark-feathered, and so the sunlight was reflected in their wings and sides.

    wow...

    live and learn, someone smart once said, and i totally agree with him / her. i love noticing new things around me every day. noticing new traits of my friends and aquaintances. learning the quirks of how the nature works. studying html which is still much of a dark forest for me, even though i have learned quite a lot during this year at the Chamber.

    live and learn. the saying is almost perfect, but i would still add two things. one is trust. lean on His knowledge, strength, care, love... "give all your troubles to the Lord, for He takes care of you," said Peter-the-apostle once. and although the phrase is about 2,000 years old, it's very true.

    and love. love God, love people, love nature, love yourself. this life's all about love (even though we sometimes neglect it or are afraid of it... or stubbornly don't want to show it... and i am guilty of that)...

    live, learn, lean, love.

  • Currently
    Thr3e
    By Ted Dekker
    see related

    [quietness]

    it's 7:36AM and i have been at work for a few minutes already. the work day starts at 9:00AM but this morning i shared a cab with a friend of mine since she needed to go to a hair salon, and i was up for a ride (easier to get up earlier than to face a trip to work in subway)

    i love to come to work early. have to admit, it does not happen too often because i am too lazy to get up early every morning, but it feels awesome. the office is empty, the quarells and rush of the previous day temporarily gone from the air. the deadlines aren't dead yet, but they keep their quiet too.

    God, the Master, The Holy of Israel, has this solemn counsel: "Your salvation requires you to turn back to me and stop your silly efforts to save yourselves. Your strength will come from settling down in complete dependence on me — The very thing you've been unwilling to do. You've said, 'Nothing doing! We'll rush off on horseback!' You'll rush off, all right! Just not far enough! You've said, 'We'll ride off on fast horses!' Do you think your pursuers ride old nags? Think again: A thousand of you will scatter before one attacker. Before a mere five you'll all run off. There'll be nothing left of you — a flagpole on a hill with no flag, a signpost on a roadside with the sign torn off." (Isaiah 30:15-17, the Message)

    the strength comes from settling down in complete dependence on God. *content sigh* it's amazing to know that Someone takes care of you and you don't have to worry. it's hard to let go of the worries sometimes because of the stupid notion that we will somehow fix the problems by worrying about them. yet... once you do let go... it's like you're an air-balloon, floating above the earth.

    however, most of the times we still "rush off on horseback." let anyone ask what we have to do and we'll bury them in our day planners and post-it notes (unless of course you don't have a Palm or Blackberry... kidding)... heh... 

    i don't want to be an empty flagpole. 

    and therefore, i am off to get myself some tea and breakfast.
  • Visit zenichka's Xanga Site
    • Name: Zee
    • Country: Ukraine
    • Metro: Kiev
    • Birthday: 2/1/1986
    • Gender: Female
    • Member Since: 10/18/2005
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  • zenichka
    @rourk - you're welcome :)))) my philosophy is - get to know as many bros and sisters in this life so that there will be more "reunions" later :)))))
  • rourk
    thanks for being my friend Zena have a nice day
    • Posted 2/3/2009 9:35 PM
    • by rourk
  • Ajnabi_al_Angrezi
    Because I say so! No, well..... I have a certain thing to sort out. See you in a bit.
  • Ajnabi_al_Angrezi
    Um..... This may be a bit odd, but for the next few weeks my name is Adam Smith...... -Mr Adam Smith God Bless!
  • Ajnabi_al_Angrezi
    That, my dear is known as the Chatboard Existentialist Predicament. Many believe that a chatboard has an essence independent of what can be seen, heard or felt and that, whether or not a chatboard is used, it still remains a chatboard in itself. Some philosophers, such as Jean-Paul Sartre disagree,
  • zenichka
    what's the point in chatboard if no one ever really uses it? :""(((
Runaway Pastor by David S. Hayes

Breakers by David S. Hayes

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